…but damn!
I have been trying to teach my 3 year old, Jaxon, how to make a deal. Honestly, most of it has been self serving. Telling him things like, “If we play outside for 10 more minutes then we have to go eat dinasaur chicken, deal?” Or, “Today we are going to go the grocery store, then the gym, and then to the pool, deal?” It usually takes a minute but eventually he will agree to the deal and it saves a tantrum later. Continue reading “People told me it would go fast….”
I know. You are used to seeing and hearing Love Sees NO Color. Perhaps we can flip the script a bit today.
My first job out of college was as a middle school counselor at a county school in Minnesota. I loved that job. I loved the kids. I felt as if I was doing good and needed work. I was also pretty sure I had all the answers to solve the world’s problems. Terribly wrong, but pretty sure of myself as a young graduate 🙂 I had strong opinions and varying views on social issues. I had a lot to learn. I should also note that I, as before mentioned in this blog, had a lot of pent up pain revolving around race. At this same time in the 90’s , a new slogan was popping up on shirts, bumper stickers and was plastered all over the school walls…Love Sees No Color. I actually remember wearing the shirt. In reflection, I was not Staying True to myself. I fundamentally disagreed. Continue reading “LOVE SEES COLOR”
I drive a 4 cylinder Honda Accord. Great car by many measures. It’s about 6 years old, in good condition and best of all…it is paid in full. Lately I have been throwing around the idea of getting a new car. A faster car. One with a fancier name on the hood. One that would…feed my ego. Now look, I am not judging anyone that drives a nice car or that has nice things. I have nice things and my wife drives her dream car. I am judging myself. I am judging myself because when I really explore why I have been considering buying a new car it is because I have been comparing myself to other people. Whether it be people I know or the good looking guy in a BMW that pulled up next to me at the stop light. I call this a “shake my head moment”. I have to stop and shake some sense back into my brain and reconnect with myself. Continue reading “Apples to Oranges”
Being on crutches is limiting.
I have physically been on crutches several times in my life. Torn ligaments in my ankle. Knee surgery. I was surely limited in what I could do. And frustrated. But I have realized that my mental crutches have been far more crippling to me and the people in my life, than the physical ones. What the helk is a mental crutch? I will define them as, something we use as an excuse for our negative behaviors or beliefs that are limiting our potential, damaging our relationships or keeping us stagnant in our evolution. We use them as a crutch when justifying our lack of empathy, poor behavior, or for not being smart enough, worthy of love, or able to get the promotion we want. Most, if not all of us have them. Unfortunately, I have found in my work that most of us don’t recognize them in the context of my above definition. How do they develop? Continue reading “Lose the Crutches”
About 5 months ago I was asked to sit in on an interview for my client. I enjoy interviewing people. Finding out the candidates story. Figuring out if they have the required skill set and if they are a cultural fit. In general, meeting new people and hopefully finding a great addition to the relevant team. In this particular instance we were building a recruiting team and looking for a strong addition. The woman we were interviewing had a strong resume. Unfortunately her interview did not follow suit. She seemed somewhat scattered, not sure of herself or why she wanted the job, and could not articulate the potential value she could bring. At the end of the interview when asked if she had any questions, she asked, “So do you think you will consider me for this job?” I looked to my interviewing partner…she looked stunned at the question. It was an uncomfortable moment. Why? Because the answer to her question was no. Continue reading “The Gift of Truth”
In 2010 I was accepted into the GBC LEADERship program…one of the best of it’s kind nationally. I was flattered, excited and frankly, nervous as hell. I was to spend a year with around 50 other leaders. The insecruties that I have alluded to in this blog were dripping from my pores as the first day of the program came closer. Partly because I had read up on my classmates. Included in my class were partners at the biggest law firms in Baltimore, owners of multi million dollar businesses, big wigs of M&T bank, the Chief of Staff for the Lt. Governor, PhD’s from Hopkins….and then there was me. Ugh! Continue reading “Wave the White Flag”
This past year I moved my family to a new neighborhood. A neighborhood that my wife and I felt wonderful about when thinking about where to raise our sons….a seemingly great sense of community, great schools, a house with plenty of space and a great yard for our boys. A community that we now call home. Continue reading “Suspend Judgement”
If you have been following this blog you have gotten a glimpse of my story. You have heard some of what drives me and what I am attempting to do daily in my work with people and some of why I started this blog. I want to take just a few minutes to make it more clear why I am taking the time to write about life and leadership and in some posts focusing on cliches. Continue reading “Not So Gentle Reminder”
I will never forget the call I got from my Dad the day the above picture was taken. With a quiver in his voice he said something like, “I just spent the day with the woman that played a major role in making it possible for you to be my son…Rosa Parks”. This is one of my favorite pictures of my Dad. It does not capture his true essence as my Dad, but captures a humble moment in his life and one that meant something incredibly deep and personal to him. I simply can not imagine what my life would be like without the deep influence of this man. Continue reading “Father’s Day Reflection 2015”
I have heard many people use the word cliche. In most instances it was used to describe something marginal. Or, to put something in a negative context. The usual. Boring. Average.
By definition a cliche is: A phrase or opinion that is overused and lacks original thought. Again, seemingly negative, right? Continue reading “Be Cliche’”